I remember so much from the past, that I wonder how much of my life I have wasted on a false memory. Have my fantasies clouded my ability to reason? It would be a shame to realise, that one year of my life, I had sunk to the bottom of the ocean. Unable to swim back up, unable to see the light and I’m always wondering…what would have happened if I had never allowed myself to give in to my doubt? Was it meant to be this way…it feels like everything happened for a reason. And this reason, is what I’m trying to find, to make sense of the person I am inside. To help the others who, like me, are searching to quiet the voices in their minds, voices that do not belong within us. To let out the bad that we should have never allowed to enter in. And perhaps, I am fine with it, fine to have seen the terror, the trauma, the unspeakable misery maybe because I know now, I understand now, I can speak now, with truth and enlightenment. I miss the girl I once was, and I loved her who she was: so bright, so alive and so passionate…she always had something to look forward to in tomorrow. But there is still tomorrow, and I can find a new path that will either take me back to the beginning or to a new one. For now, I am at peace. Just for now.