I may be so young to not know anything with my small mind, but I feel so much. 

Take me to my hometown a hundred times, but as soon as I leave,

I have to write and watch and pretend like I’m one of them to believe that it was all real. 


My skin is not smooth like cream, I have damaged my body to understand what it is to be invisible,

Because when your beauty disappears, you see people for what they really are. 

They think I didn’t have to do this, but my purpose lies far beyond their mundane expectations. 


Wild, they do not understand the freedom a single word offers and yet I lie to myself, 

Can I really take something so extravagant and is my heart prepared for such a thrill?

It will awaken my dry bones & reveal the words inside when my emotions are rising high.


None of this means anything, they will all pass. 

I doubt that I can allow myself the luxury of living in two worlds and ignore the pain that comes with this burden. 

But everything has been a game up till this point and everyone who calls me mean forgot that I already jumped over that hurdle.  


What remains is the music that we listen to when we’re sad but should even in happiness. 

How do I make the moments of pure euphoria turn gold? 

Or do I have to accept that happiness flies away and comes back when I am patient?

It seems that only in moments of acceptance of our flaws do we receive this irreplaceable gift. 


I have learnt what life is like for the pauper and the prince, but how will my story end?

I only want to help others and reduce the pain in the world but am I right with myself? 

Truly performing good deeds requires integrity but there are breakdowns when I feel my past is too tainted for it to be true. 


How can I say I am returning home when I do not love where I live? 

I never got to say goodbye properly and I held back the tears for my grandmother like I was holding onto dear life, but I wanted to cry. 

This first world only deepens the pain, let’s see how far I go and how long I’ll be able to take it.