WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS?
Calling on to God, only He can offer me my salvation, my purpose. Everybody pushed him away but now I find it easier to get to Him, I feel so many emotions and pain that He died for me, someone like me, someone unworthy of His love. I don’t deserve it. But my heart keeps reaching beyond the stars, moving into places that I can only imagine with eyes closed. The Lord takes me higher in my simplest and saddest of moments, He lets me feel pain so that I can embrace the relief of happiness and joy. I never thought I believed in things that were invisible, but in my heart, like I loved the music that made imagination soar and turn into vast colourful rainbows and soft rain, it couldn’t be false. I knew it to be true. I am struggling to obey his commandments but I know that they are beautiful and true, but in this world where I cannot avoid the lingering feeling of ugliness and despair, I’m not sure where to step and when to duck. Either way I get hit by someone. If I could just follow God, I wouldn’t be so hurt, I wouldn’t have brought this on myself.