HAPPY SHOCK

HAPPY SHOCK

I tore the flesh of the cherry to find that it too bled red like me, but I envied that it didn’t need to worry about the demands of life. Its blood and flesh was tangy, dancing on my tongue like poison but I couldn’t stop eating its flesh to see if I could take it all and consume it, to see if I was hungry enough to be savage. I needed something so still, even the soft splash of a water droplet against the floor of the sink would startle me, it had to be invisibly silent. Even as a savage, even as a barbarian, I am fearful of the little tranquilities that amuse some and escape others. 

So what do I tell my friends who are fighting for their lives? I’d tell them that there is no point living on earth if we don’t believe in something and if we don’t die for what we believe in. Everything will fade away, your youth, your beauty, the passions you thought would outlast the stars, they burn away as your life flashes before your eyes. Whatever you leave for others will never be enough for you in your deathbed. So actually open your eyes to this world, and see that there is nothing to live for if you’re not willing to die for something.

I won’t say I’d die for anyone anymore, for I can’t bear the weight of a single soul when my own is crushed by the weight of my sea of sins. When youth dies, I thought life would begin anew and I thought I’d get another chance but I cannot say my life is like a child anymore, my mind longs for the things behind while as a child I looked towards days unknown. I didn’t think I’d fall so easily, but I know I couldn’t have picked myself up without prayer. I’m learning more and more what things really matter and to live life like there is no tomorrow.

Your science, your knowledge, your academic merits, all the people who love you, your name in lights, your contribution to the world, selling your soul. You give it all away and you’ll have nothing. Live life with your soul within & don’t give it to the world. We should know that this world is corrupt, accept the good and the bad and live like it’s life and not living death. For we may be alive, but our bodies are dying to the world. Don’t kill pain but allow everything to shatter so you can show the world your scars, show them you don’t give in to the devil.

Your blood means nothing to you. Oxygen comes and goes and we say it’s invisible. All the things we need to live are invisible so go through life with eyes closed tight so you don’t have to see the world for its falsity. You don’t have to break so easily if learn to burn your fears and your past self in an unquenchable fire. Even if tomorrow is another day, who knows if we will really wake up from our sleep, so live each day with purpose and know what you’re dying for because once this journey is about to end, you might not have the time to decide where we go from here.

Invite all the happiness, sorrow, the shock, the pain, the euphoria, all the memories of yesteryears even if it was a moment ago. Live nostalgically and with fire in your hearts so each moment of your life from now on is blessed. Love those who elude you and learn to walk away when you know you can do no more for parasites. Love through it all, for hate is a vacuum and it will suck you in and you will begin to understand the terror of darkness. Don’t put yourself in a position that you might not get out of, but accept all the beauties of life that remind you of a life that once was.

As I watch the blood of the cherry trace my skin, I become so aware of my own existence. Skins that hold blood; its dark red blood is like mine. And I say to myself, the cherry has no soul but it had life to grow and blossom, to have skin a colour of deep purple. We can live without life but we cannot truly be free without our souls. 

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